


Can Anyone Explain?

by ObliqueOptimism



Series: Like Real People Do [2]
Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: ASL, Deaf Character, Gen, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Sober Klaus Hargreeves
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-15
Updated: 2019-08-24
Packaged: 2020-09-01 12:16:58
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,401
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20257963
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ObliqueOptimism/pseuds/ObliqueOptimism
Summary: Klaus is learning how to live while deaf.





	1. Eudora

**Author's Note:**

> well this happened

The brain is really weird. Like, _so weird_. Like, say a hypotetical someone deafens themself (ouchie) and then cannot hear anymore and it’s wonderful and nice (lies: Klaus misses music and Ben’s voice and hearing cars and rain and dogs and the sound of heels on the ground going _click_ and _clack_) because now he can fucking sleep but sometimes the brain is weird and he hears his name.

Klaus turned his head, where he heard his name. Maybe he was getting his hearing back? But no, no one there. Not even a ghost. Just the brain being fucking weird and making noises. 

He’d been warned that this could happen.

He didn’t like it.

Fucking _rude_.

“Something wrong?” Ben caught his attention by waving his arms and then slowly signing. 

Of course he’d picked up on the split second panic (he doesn’t want to hear god damn it) at hearing his name (don’t wear it out), his wide eyes, a quick intake of breath, his head turned to the side, and heartbeat rising. 

Fuck this noise (ha!), he needed a spa day (he needed a hit). A day where he didn’t have to worry about getting his hearing back after the damage healed. Let it heal incorrect, let that fucking doctor have been right, let him never hear a sound again. 

“I’m fine, Bennifer,” Klaus responded in what he hoped was a quiet voice. 

Vanya was--

Practicing the violin in the other room?

Vanya wasn’t really one for spa days.

Oh sure, he could talk her into one, she was terribly guilty about him deafening himself (why?) but she’d taken a dose of her medicine an hour ago and it was always easier to get her to smile early in the morning, before she took any (he loved her smile). 

Klaus knew how medication worked.

_Of course he did_. 

Anti-anxiety meds seemed to keep her calm. That was her emotion: calm. Sure, she would still feel sad (guilty. why?) or happy or mad but her emotions didn’t show easily. But he knew she felt deeply about a lot. He’d found her manuscript she’d started. (Okay so he liked digging in the trash sometimes, he was aware his spirit animal was a raccoon.) It was proof that even though she never told him (showed) about her feelings _she had them_. Of course she had them, everyone did.

Well maybe not daddy (Klaus sometimes thought he wasn’t even human).

Dad had to have feelings at one point. There was a sad woman who sometimes would follow Reggie around. She didn’t say much (would only tell Klaus how sorry she was that _her Reggie_ abused them) and she _loved_ hearing Vanya play violin.

Klaus often wondered who she was, who his dad was to her. 

He’d mentioned her to Reginald once.

_Never Again_

**”Klaus.”**

There it fucking was again. He jerked around, putting his back against the wall. He’d been told that his brain may make it seem like he heard whispers (he was tired of hearing whispers) and that was totally normal for someone like him. Someone who went from having full hearing (ha! he’s had hearing damage for years from the ghosts yelling as well as blaring music at the parties he attended) to completely deaf so suddenly. If his hearing had slowly deteriorated it maybe wouldn’t happen (as much). 

He’d heard about phantom pain in limbs after they’d been amputated and this was similar.

(Also normal hearing people sometimes had this, a recent medical paper said it was signs of a healthy brain. Can you imagine? Him? A healthy brain? Don’t make him laugh. _Ha!_)

In any case Vanya did not have nail polish, face masks, bath bombs.

No spa.

Oh she’d go out and get them but they wouldn’t have as relaxing as a time as they should because of the guilt she now carried (why? he’d _told_ her it wasn’t her fault). And no way her or Di would let him hang out with his old friends and have a spa day with them.

Which was fine.

(Lies: he missed his friends. He knew some _weren’t_ actually his friends but some stood by him again and again and helped more than any of his siblings ever had. Besides, literally saving each other from fights and rapes really helped forge a bond. There were some young kids he’d saved not too long ago who had started to follow him around like lost ducklings. He hoped they were safe and okay. Kayla was hopefully looking out for them now, teaching them the ropes. They’d probably heard that he’d hurt himself in rehab. Hope they weren’t worried. Hope they didn’t think he’d killed himself.)

So, spa day. How to get one.

Diego would be the same as Vanya except maybe funnier because the boy needed to _relax_ (although Eudora probably helped him _relax_).

Oh!

Of course.

Eudora.

Klaus didn’t really know her. At All. But she always seemed nice enough. And he needed to get to know his (possible) future sister-in-law, _obviously_. And what better way to get to know her than a spa day? 

**“Klaus.”**

Of course when most deaf people’s brains made them hear things it probably wasn’t their name but considering how that was the background noise whenever he was sober (he was sober now, wasn’t he?) it made sense that his stupid brain thought that was what was missing. 

Whenever the whispers came now it was odd. Like they were there but not.

Like they were ghosts.

But like how everyone else viewed ghosts.

Not how he did.

He looked to Ben who was apparently in the middle of signing to him, “--are you?”

“I want a spa day,” Klaus sighed, letting his head hit the wall he was sitting up against. “Think I could talk Eudora into one? Should I invite Vanya? Diego? Or just something for me and Eudora? And you, of course, brother mine.”

**”Klaus.”**

“Jesus Christ.” That one sounded _close_. This shouldn’t be happening. He didn’t care how ‘normal’ it was for his brain to be a bitch, _it shouldn’t be happening_. He stuck fucking knitting needles in his ears for fuck’s sake. He shouldn’t ever have to hear his name again. (His name is Number Four Hargreeves, Klaus is just a nickname. Number Four, nothing could compare to usually being called by what could be thought of as his middle name. (_Two plus two equals four. Four score and seven years ago. Fore! It’s four passed four pm. I want to get that for you._) Daddy always first and middle named him. _”Number Four, you must get over your silly fears of the dead.”_ Let’s see what you would fear if you could see the dead, Old Man.)

He knew it wouldn’t help (_he knew, okay?_) but he put his hands over his ears. The voice was in his head now. Fuck this shit. (He let himself be talked into ear damage, but the ghost doctor tried to talk him into an ice pick lobotomy. _As if._)

Suddenly there was warm, gentle hands over his as they pulled his back down. 

Vanya had the guilt look on again. It was written in her eyebrows. (Why?) “You okay?” She signed.

He didn’t want this. He didn’t want to be a burden on his siblings, he just wanted some _quiet_. The plan wasn’t that he’d move in with Vanya or Diego (or anyone else). Honestly there hadn’t been much of a plan. (Lies: none of his siblings find out and he can continue snorting cocaine off dumpsters at ten in the morning for a nice pick-me-up, just now it would be in silence.) Part of the reason he continued to sleep on the sofa. Maybe one day Vanya would realize he wasn’t meant to be a functional human being and would let him go. Catch-and-Release. 

He digresses.

Klaus cleared his throat, “I think I need a relaxing spa day.”

She frowned, “I have classes all day. I could cancel if you needed.”

“Oh no, no, Van. We can’t ask you to cut off part of family income. I was thinking of asking Eudora. Y’know, a little bonding time. Get to know the woman who has Diego tied around her little finger,” he gave a large smile. It felt cracked, like he didn’t do it right.

Vanya nodded before getting up and grabbing his cell phone. Handing it over, she held his hand for a few seconds longer than necessary, tapping a small tune on his skin with her fingers. 

His smile felt softer, more real.

Music did always help him. 

Nowadays--

Well--

Too bad. (So sad.)

Vanya left him to make his plans.

He texted Eudora, asking if she did spa days. He then made it apparent that he didn’t expect her to take him to a real spa, but hang out at her’s or Vanya’s and light scented candles and paint nails and put cucumbers over their eyes (why? what exactly did that do?). 

She said she’d pick him up after work. 

In two hours.

**”Klaus.”**

Two hours, huh?

_fuck_

He’d been thinking of getting back into tarot (never helped his powers, not like daddy wanted it too, didn’t help him connect to the ghosts (thank god) but it kept his hands busy, it made him feel important, a touch stone to reality, if he didn’t know what was real he could ask the cards) and he’d lost (pawned) the deck Reggie had ‘gifted’ him from childhood. Not that he’d want that deck, anything from Reggie was to be tossed aside like an empty syringe. (Forget a line of cocaine, some heroin would be _delightful_.) And to make his new deck _really something_ he’d been planning on making it himself.

With effort, Klaus got up (he sat on the floor too long and his foot fell asleep, the traitor) and grabbed the notebook Vanya had been using off and on to talk to him when they didn’t know the ASL and spelling everything out would take way too long.

He could sketch for two hours, planning what he wanted each card in his deck to look like.

He could keep busy for two hours.

It was only two hours.

Not that long. 

He could do this. One day at a time and all that. Only this time he had two things going for him and his sobriety. 1. He couldn’t hear (thank god, thank ghost doctor, thank himself) and 2. He actually had a support system for once. Vanya trying to make him move in with her (he couldn’t take up her space, space she’d made for herself, she’d never had a lot of it back at the Academy but she’d made a life out here and he couldn’t impose on that, one day her guilt (why?) would fade and she’d kick him out and that would be _fine_), Diego stopping by and being gruff on the outside and soft on the inside, and Eudora who was willing to do spa days with him.

And then there was a hand on his shoulder and he turned and grabbed the arm, forcing it behind their back before he knew what was happening. Stupid muscle memory. Stupid training from birth to kill people. Stupid Klaus.

He let go as soon as he saw it was Eudora. She didn’t look hurt (she had to be, he’d had that move done on him when they trained, it hurt like hell), wasn’t even massaging her (now) sore arm. “I’m sorry, sorry,” Klaus said. “I didn’t mean to, I didn’t hear you coming, obviously,” he gave a nervous chuckle. 

She grabbed the notebook and flipped to a page without his sketches, “I should have known to approach from the front.”

Klaus nodded in agreement while saying, “Oh, no, it's my fault. I should’ve kept track of the time.” He was out of sorts. His brain had stopped being an absolute dick since they’d set up the spa day, he hadn’t realized it had been two hours (a glance at the clock and it's been two and a half, hey wow he did it) and he hadn’t kept his phone near in case Eudora texted to cancel. He did think it was his fault for over reacting to someone touching his shoulder (an unconscious reaction) but maybe (_maybe_) they could make a new rule that no one approach him from behind him.

“Ready to go?” Eudora asked. It looked like she was maybe worried for him. For him? At him? (Why?) He hoped she couldn’t read minds. Because then _she’d know_ and he didn’t want anyone to know. (To know what? Everything. Anything.) 

While his brain had calmed down and sketching tarot cards had relaxed him some, he still did want the spa day. Get to know Eudora. Also with how he reacted when she put her hand on him made it clear he was still pretty stressed. He nodded, “Let’s make sure Vanya knows we’re leaving.”

Soon he found himself in Eudora’s car. They wouldn’t be able to talk in the car (well, he could, but she wouldn’t be able to participate in the conversation) so instead he just watched the buildings go by as they drove. He wondered where she lived. Did her and Diego move in together yet? Did she have roommates? God, what if it had dead people in it? While he (obviously) wouldn’t hear them, seeing them wasn’t great either. Maybe this wasn’t a great idea. Maybe he should call it off. Maybe--

They stopped.

It was a house, small yard, blue door. “It was my grandma’s.” Eudora said, signing hesitantly. 

Klaus nodded, excited to see her signing. Looking again he saw (probably) Eudora’s grandma from an upstairs window. If a granny is the only one in the house he’d be fine. 

In they go.

She handed him a notebook, “I got us cucumbers for our eyes, sparkling white grape juice and plastic champagne flutes, pre-cut cheese and meat with crackers for snacking. I have some candles we can light. Nail polish. I have one of those bubbling foot spa things, we’ll have to take turns with that. I’m really glad you asked to do this, I needed to relax and I wanted to get to know you better.”

“Really?” Klaus hoped his voice didn’t sound as hesitant as it felt.

She nodded. “Sorry I was late to pick you up, wanted to grab the food.”

Eudora seemed excited to do the spa day with him (she seemed especially excited to do it with _him_. why?) 

“Go ahead and get comfortable, I’ll finish gathering everything.” 

She got up and would bring things to the table, nail polish, face mask packets, the foot spa. When she dropped off the candles Klaus got out his lighter. (While he was officially sober (_seven weeks, baby_), he started smoking cigarettes more. It helped some, when he needed a hit he knew that sometimes lighting a good ol’ legal tobacco cigarette would help fight the craving. When he wanted to swallow some pills, he took some vitamins -- Vanya’s idea that Ben fully supported.)

He hoped it wouldn’t be awkward. He didn’t even know what her voice sounded like, didn’t know how it would curl with a question or be flat with sarcasm. So far he’d mostly spoken to Ben, Vanya, or Diego and even though he hadn’t seen two of them in years, he knew their cadence, how their voice tilted with certain sentences, how they would pronounce some words (Diego tended to over pronounce words because of his stutter). Klaus was worried that without the insight into Eudora he’d have trouble knowing when she spoke with sarcasm or in a joking way. The written word didn’t always lend itself to make that easy.

Thank Christ it turned out she would make sure her expression on her face was over the top. 

They started with face masks. “I pick these up at the dollar store. I keep a number of them on hand, the police academy can be stressful and sometimes you just need a little spa day.” Klaus got it, he understood, he nodded. “I guess I should start grabbing enough for two people, huh?”

Klaus’s had little glitter stars in it. 

“No offense, but you lazed around your place all day while I had to do training so I’m taking first turn on the foot spa,” Eudora winked at him. 

Klaus kept eating the cucumbers around his eyes. Sure, tasted a bit like the face mask but the look on Eudora’s face whenever she heard him _crunch_ down was hilarious. To top it off, right before they had to wash off the masks, he reached over and took one of her cucumbers.

“What is the point of the cucumbers?” She asked after laughing and eating her other cucumber.

“I don’t know, I thought you might, since you got them.”

“You said to get them! I figured you knew.”

He got his turn with the foot spa. It was fun. He’d have to find one and buy it. Where they in stores? Only sold on TV? Only gifted at parties? (Not his type of parties, obviously, otherwise he’d have a ton of them already.) 

Then they painted their nails. He kept the conversation up during it. Eudora was great with facial expressions, knowing she couldn’t write out her responses or sign when her hands were busy painting zebra stripes on his nails. 

His hands still shook slightly, a small tremor that maybe would go away (years of drug abuse _baby_) so he couldn’t give her nice stripes. She would have to deal with just adding a layer of glitter over the top. “One time I swear, I painted palm trees on Kayla’s nails and they were _gorgeous_ but I was high at the time and Ben later assured me I had not painted trees on her nails but jut globbed colors together and it was a mess.”

It was relaxing. More relaxing than he thought it would be. The two of them continued to chat and drink sparkling grape juice through the evening. The cheese and meat tray gone before the sun went down. Klaus hadn’t noticed how tense he’d been holding himself, but with each passing minute he could feel his muscles unclinch. He felt the most comfortable than he had in years. (Lies: lounging in bed after an orgasam, the rush when drugs hit _just right_ and he’s numb and all his worries and fears slide off him, the first morning after he deafened himself and he had slept through the night.)

It continued. The two of them laughed and played truth or dare and by the end of the night Klaus knew that this had been good for both of them. It had helped both him and Eudora. His (_his_) stupid idea to paint nails and light candles helped her as well. He’d watched as she relaxed along with him. It could be that after work every night she wound down (maybe not like this) and hadn’t _needed_ the spa day like he did but maybe he’d done something right for once. Something right for someone else. 

Huh.

Weird.

They ended the night like it was a sleepover. Camped out in the living room watching a romcom with popcorn and subtitles. She’d said she’d drop him back off at his (‘_Vanya’s_’ his mind supplied) apartment in the morning on her way to work. Said they would have to make this a regular thing for them. Said she had fun with him (what? why?).

It was just so crazy that this normal person would want to hang out with him again (how normal could she be, she was dating Diego). But maybe that’s what his life would be like now. Support system and all that. Could be nice. 

He fell asleep feeling hopeful.


	2. Diego

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tbh i'm not terribly happy with this chapter but whatever here it is (sorry)

Vanya was--

Gone. Out and about. Living her best life. (Not stuck by Klaus’s side. Good for her.) Doing music things? Grocery shopping? A date (ha!)? Ben probably knew. Diego probably knew. Vanya probably told Klaus.

He’d been trying to read a book, one that Ben said was good. And it was, but when the child ghost who came around sometimes had thought it would be funny to stick her hands in front of the pages, making it impossible to see, and impossible to move her hands, _well--_

He’d been preoccupied when Vanya left and Diego came in.

He slammed the book shut through the girl’s hands and gave her a playful glare. She appeared to giggle at him. 

Ben said she was four (he was Four.)

Sticking his tongue out at her, he got up and put his book on the table before going to bother Diego. He was on his phone, looking at some sort of shopping app. Klaus loved shopping (one of his skills), he could help. 

Climbing on top of the table, Klaus sat down right in front of Diego before lifting a bare foot and putting it right in his brother’s face (ha!). Diego said something (?) before giving a glare (more of a glower) and pushed Klaus off the table (rude!). 

“That was homophobic!” Klaus cried out, pushing himself into a sitting position. “Abelist too probably. _I’m deaf now_. Hate crimes!” He shook his finger at Diego who rolled his eyes (why did he look fond when he did it?). 

“Don’t stick your feet in my face,” Diego signed. “You made me drop my phone.” He picked it up and looked it over to see if it broke.

“What if you broke me, huh? All worried about your phone being broken when I could’ve broken something.” Klaus was sure he was fine, maybe slight bruising, but he did stick his foot in Diego’s face so it was fair.

“You don’t cost as much as the phone.” Diego paused as Klaus cackled. “I didn’t mean it like that.”

“Please! You don’t know how much I cost, _baby_,” he winked and watched as Diego made a face. His jaw clinched a way that Klaus recognized as angrily protective. (Why? He’d just pushed him off the table. Why was he now acting protective? Was he protective of his phone?) 

Klaus imagined the silence was stilted and awkward on Diego’s end (to Klaus it’s just the new normal). Half the time their conversations always ended up like this, one of them said the wrong thing and then they pause for the count of one, two, three, four (he’s Four) and then bam! Ignore it. Never happened. File that away. Water under (and over) the bridge.

“So, what’cha doing?” Klaus asked, laying down on the floor but putting his feet in Diego’s lap. (Sometimes Klaus liked to sit upside down on the sofa (his bed) or lay on the floor and just view the world from a different angle -- not as different as the drugs always made it seem, it was a poor substitute but when needs must). 

“It’s our anniversary today. I need a gift for Eudora,” Diego sighed. “First year anniversary.”

“Kind of a big deal then, hm?” Klaus pointed out. “If you need to go shopping you can. Like, I’ll be fine ‘til Van gets back. I’m having a good day.” (Truth: he was. He slept through the night without nightmares, the only ghosts he saw since waking up was Ben and the little girl, his cravings for illegal substances was lower as well, _and!_ he ate a whole sandwich at lunch. _Ben was proud._)

Diego gave him a measured look. Possibly he didn’t want to be the one who first left Klaus alone since _the incident_ (he may harm himself or get drugs or both, oh the possibilities are endless), possibly he didn’t trust Klaus (obviously), possibly he didn’t have the same definition of a good day as Klaus did. _Possibly--_ “Help me find something for her.”

Klaus’s time to give Diego a measured look, “Just ‘cause I like more feminine things doesn’t mean--”

“You guys are friends, right?” Diego prompted (which, _what?_ were they?). “You did the spa thing. I don’t know, I’d gotten a text from her saying you two were going to hang out. So you’re friends.”

Logically that did make sense. Why (why?) hang out with someone you weren’t friends with? Other than the first time being the tester, after the first time is when you realize you don’t like that person very well and you don’t hang out again. He and Eudora had only hung out once so far, so maybe she realized--

Nope. Those thoughts stop now, for today was a good day (why was it a good day, why did it need to stay a good day, some drugs would help it stay a good day). “So I get to go shopping?” Klaus asked hesitantly. This sounded promising. His good day may turn into a great day. 

“For Eudora. Not you,” Diego clarified.

Klaus could work with that.

They ended up at a mall. It’d been a while since Klaus had been to a mall (things are expensive, drugs are more expensive, and he’d always picked drugs over food, clothes, or shelter), he did most of his shopping at consignment and resale shops. Goodwill. (Fuck Salvation Army.) Diego led him to a store that would be perfect for spa days. “No, you can’t get her this stuff. She likes it yes, but now it’s _apparently_ a thing for me and her and like, she knows what she likes. Do you know her favorite scents?”

Diego rolled his eyes and took him to a jewelry store. 

Klaus had never seen Eudora wear jewelry.

Next was a clothing store.

Klaus found a lot that he liked but he wasn’t sure what Eudora would like (why was he here again?). “Will you buy me this?” Klaus held up a really stunning blouse. 

“We aren’t here for you,” Diego reminded him.

“Sure, but I have like five shirts, two pants, one skirt. And Vanya’s clothes are so _boring_.” Diego looked taken aback (why? he knew Van’s clothes were boring). 

“Fine. We can get clothes for you. If you find anything else we can get that too,” Diego signed slowly. “But not too much, not everything you find.”

Klaus rolled his eyes. He got it, don’t waste all of Diego’s money. (Good day turning into great day, who knew?)

“You know more about how your girlfriend dresses, Di. You pick out clothes for her and I’ll pick out clothes for me.”

And so they split up in the store (oh Diego never strayed far, kept a close eye on Klaus, but why? not like he’d find drug in the clearance section). After his hands were full of clothes, Klaus looked to the changing rooms. He should try them on but--

There were rules.

1\. Public bathrooms: if it was one with stalls, that you lock behind you but the bottom is open and should it stay locked you can climb out from under and the door into the bathroom is a door that swings shut is okay, those are ideal. If it’s the type that is single stall, just a toilet and a sink with a mirror and a full door that locks and its small and dark and _smells_. No. Never.

2\. Public changing rooms: if they had the stalls with the bottom out, much like the bathroom stalls, that’s great, yes please. Those are fine. Ideally it’ll be the changing rooms that are just a curtain that you slide closed. Yes, perfect. Love those. If it’s the full door and a small room? Worse than the bathrooms (even if they usually smell better) because they were smaller and tighter and Klaus didn’t really enjoy panic attacks.

The changing rooms in this store were the _worst_ kind. So, he’d try the clothes on back at Vanya’s (not his home). (He would continue to have a good (great) day.)

So instead he held the clothes up to his body, to see if they seemed like they’d be too big (he didn’t usually have the problem of them being too small). He was busy going through his pile of clothes and didn’t notice Diego right away. (“What do you think Ben?” “Good. Also maybe don’t talk to me in public alone?” “Like I would ever stop doing that.”) (He couldn't hear, not like he’d know if Diego called his name.)

But then Diego’s hand was around his arm as he just grabbed Klaus’s pile and ushered him towards the check out. Klaus frowned, “What’s going on?” 

Diego, of course, couldn’t answer (his hands were full of Klaus) but Ben was kind enough to appear in front of them and walked backwards, signing, “A rude lady was making a scene.”

Had to be someone alive, otherwise Diego wouldn’t be pulling him away. Glancing backwards Klaus saw someone who fit the suburbia mom stereotype glaring at them, saying _something_ and red in the face.

Diego kept a hand on Klaus as he paid, and the coldest stare towards the woman. Klaus let himself get led out to the car afterwards and sat quietly in the car as he eyed Diego who yelled to himself (and Ben) while he punched his steering wheel. 

Klaus idly wondered if Diego got anything for Eudora (Klaus idly wondered what made Diego so mad at the woman).

Eventually Diego gave a full body sigh and turned to him. “Does that happen often?”

“Excuse me, brother mine, but I don’t fully know what just happened so I’m going to go with ‘_no_’.” 

“She attacked you,” Diego explained.

“Um, no? I didn’t even realize she was there, Di. No attacking me,” Klaus was _certain_ she hadn’t like, hit him, or anything (right? he was maybe a bit crazy but he would’ve noticed _that_).

“She was yelling at you, calling you names,” Diego answered. (Oh, sure. Okay, _verbally_ attacked him. Got it.) “Do people call you,” he paused, “those things a lot?”

“_No._” Klaus said (lied).

“Don’t lie to me.”

Klaus shrugged his shoulders, “I am a homeless, pansexual, genderqueer, junkie, who -- as far as strangers can tell -- talks to the air as if it were a person.” He put a hand on Diego’s shoulder, “Whatever she was calling me, I promise I’ve been called worse. It’s fine, Di. You didn’t need to go all shining armor for me. I didn’t even know it was happening!”

“Past tense.”

“What?”

“You were all of that. You aren’t homeless anymore. And you’re a recovering addict.” Diego tried to correct him. Klaus rolled his eyes (he wasn’t stupid -- it was still _Vanya’s_ home, not his and a recovering addict was still a junkie). “You aren’t,” Diego repeated himself after he saw the eyeroll.

Time to change the subject.

“Did you just buy me stuff or is there stuff for Eudora there?” Klaus grabbed the bag to look (whispering a sorry to Ben as he went through him).

“No,” Diego replied. “Was busy.” Was busy watching Klaus (protecting him? why? from that lady? she couldn’t hurt him, he couldn’t even _hear_ her). 

“Okay, so we’ll just pick up some flowers and some good take out and then I’ll, I don’t know, bake you cupcakes or a souffle. Romantic meal. That’s nice, right? Then just say your gift is something you ordered online and it's not in yet,” Klaus knew the last time he tried to romance someone he just bought a guy drink and then batted his eyelashes asking if the gentleman had a spare pill or two (he did have a spare pill and after sharing a _filthy_ kiss was more than happy to share his drugs (and his bed) with Klaus). 

“You don’t know how to make a souffle,” Diego protested.

“Um, yes I do. How dare you suggest I don’t. I do know, right Ben?” Klaus turned to Ben to see him nod, “See? Ben agreed with me.”

“You could just be saying he agreed with you because you want to make a mess in your kitchen.”

(Vanya’s kitchen.)

“Bet you twenty bucks I can do it,” Klaus argued. “Though if you take me up on this we need to stop at a kitchenware store. I don’t think Vanya has a souffle mold.”

They’d stopped at a kitchenware store.

As Klaus started making the souffle (finding all the ingredients as well as wherever Vanya had hidden her electric mixer) he maybe also started singing. Now when he could hear himself sing, Klaus _wasn’t bad_ (he wasn’t good either) but since deafening himself he has overall tried to keep to humming only. But he usually sang when he baked (real songs as often as songs that were just him detailing what he was doing). 

He probably sounded bad. Pitchy.

(Diego deserved to listen to bad singing, he didn’t believe Klaus about baking a souffle.)

After Klaus had gotten started, he turned around to use the mixer and was finally facing the rest of Vanya’s apartment (with Diego and Ben). 

Ben looked smug (of course he knew that Klaus could bake some of the more difficult desserts and pastries, having been around when he learned).

Diego, however, looked confused, “Did you just break the eggs one handed?”

“What? Like it’s hard?” Klaus laughed. “But yeah. I can actually crack two eggs at once by hitting them against one another but souffles use egg whites and you are less likely to break the yoke with some shell if you break it on the counter instead of the side of a bowl or, y’know, another egg.”

“You’re singing was pitchy,” Ben told him.

Klaus stuck his tongue out at him. 

Diego watched as Klaus made the souffle, “You better have some actual food lined up from someone else, Di. I can bake some fancy french things but otherwise I’m lost in the kitchen.” Before he could explain more, Vanya came home.

She seemed taken aback at Klaus baking.

“What is happening right now?” She asked both of them.

“Diego and Eudora’s anniversary is today so I’m baking them a souffle!” Klaus maybe just got some meringue on his nose. 

“When did you learn how to make souffles?”

Klaus shrugged, “Dead pastry chef followed me around some. I can crack eggs one handed now.” He winked at Diego.

“It’s impressive,” Diego agreed.

By the time Diego was leaving, with the souffle held gently in his arms, Klaus still felt _good_ (it had been a good day). Diego said _something_ but his hands were full and Vanya was in the shower, “Sorry, Di, I--”

Ben appeared beside Klaus, “He asked me to translate. I’ve never been on this side of the translation circle.” He laughed. “Diego said thanks, and he owes you twenty bucks.”

“Fuck yeah, I win the bet!” Klaus cheered.

“He also said he had fun today.”

“Sure, I bet scaring Karen or whatever her name is was fun,” Klaus shrugged.

“That actually wasn’t fun. Diego wanted you to know that he had fun hanging out with you. Specifically, he wanted you to know that. That he had fun with you.” Ben paused in his signing, “We both had fun hanging out with you today.” 

“Well I had fun today too,” Klaus was sure his voice was small. He knew he spoke hesitantly. (Why were they making sure Klaus knew they had fun _with him_. That was weird, right? It was just -- it was only because it’d been a _good_ day?)

After that Diego gave an exaggerated nod and let himself out, kicking the door shut after him. 

“Want to talk about it?” Ben asked. He probably figured Klaus was a little out of sorts.

“I want to try on my clothes. Fashion show for you and Van, eh?” (Klaus wanted a special little pill or two but clothes would do.)

The good day continued into a good night as he did a fashion show for his siblings (who did the weird jazz hand clapping) and then he had fun putting outfits together for Vanya to try on for her own fashion show.

“Sorry you’re stuck in your hoodie and jacket. _Like a loser!_”

“Still more fashionable than you.”

Klaus threw a pillow at Ben but instead it went through him and knocked over a lamp. “Oops.”


	3. Vanya

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so this didn't turn out as fluffy as i first thought it would (oops) and atm i have a plan for another story in this series (maybe more to come? idk) but if you have an idea for a fic feel free to let me know and maybe i'll write it? i can't promise. but thank you all for the wonderful support. honestly, this fandom has been one of the nicest i've been in. i cannot believe how much fic i've written (and finished) for tua and honestly you all have a lot to do with that. previous to tua i hadn't written any proper fic in years, so thank you. y'all are amazing.

There was screaming (why was there screaming) and it was loud (he shouldn’t be able to hear it). Some of the screaming was him, most was the ghosts. They gathered tight and close around him, reaching out to touch (because the previous night he’d made Ben solid, _they could touch him now_).

And then Klaus woke up when he fell off his bed (the sofa) and the world was catapulted into silence.

(Lies: he could still hear the echoes of his nightmare reverberating in his head as well as his heartbeat pounding in his ear.)

Then the overhead light came on, drowning out the lamp light that was always on (because Klaus may have a decent reason to be afraid of the dark but it didn’t stop him from thinking that his phobia was a stupid bitch) and Vanya appeared over him.

“Are you okay?”

“Fine, totally fine sis,” Klaus lied. “Just y’know, rolled off m’bed.”

Vanya frowned at that. She probably could tell he’d had another nightmare. (The previous night, after finding out he could make Ben (ghosts) solid and after telling her about his special training he’d had a few nightmares as they had a sleepover in her room. That was two nights in a row of bad nightmares. Hopefully the pattern wouldn’t continue.) She probably noticed his sweat and harsh breathing, his wild and fearful eyes. 

He hoped he hadn’t been crying.

Vanya helped him up and tapped out a tune with her fingers on his arm as she led him to her bedroom. (He assumed it was a tune, some music, it could’ve been morse code though. Doubtful. They both loved music so much.) Once they got there she turned on her lamp and sat him down on her bed.

“Think we can fit another bed in here?” She asked.

“We getting another roommate? Someone who can help contribute to the bills? Unlike little ol’ me?” Klaus was very confused. He knew he had it easy, living at Vanya’s. She didn’t ask for money or any help around the place. Of course he helped with cleaning but surely him being around made the bills higher. A third roommate (or just a proper second one and Klaus could run away back to his homeless ways) would make sense. Too bad Diego was probably going to move in with Eudora soon otherwise they could ask him to be the new roomie.

“First off, the two of you are more than enough roommates,” Vanya said, then explained that the two she spoke of was Klaus and Ben (she included him as a roommate!). “And don’t worry about the bills. You’ve not raised any of them. And you barely eat so I haven't even had to buy more groceries.”

“Then why are we planning on getting another bed?” She had her room and he had the sofa (until she kicked him out, too tired of dealing with him and his _Klausness_ \-- he was aware he best taken in small doses). 

“Because you need a real bed,” Vanya responded. 

“I’m fine on the sofa, honestly,” Klaus defended. He’d told her that a few times after she brought him back from the hospital. He thought they’d never have to revisit the conversation again. (_“Honestly, Van, it’s just as good, if not better! than what I’m used to. Why -- Vanya, why are you crying?”_) 

“I haven’t been a good sister to you,” Vanya said.

“I’m sorry, what? You’ve been great!” Klaus threw his hands up. (Why was she saying this? Didn’t she understand? She’s the first person to be there for him when something bad happened. The first person to look at him and not throw him away.) “You’re supporting me. If anything I haven’t been--”

She put her hand over his mouth for a second, shutting him up. Taking her hand away slowly she gave him a look _do not talk_ it said, _my turn_ it said. Then she said, “I realized it a few weeks ago when Diego bought you clothes. You’d been wearing the same outfits for weeks. You never asked and I never thought. I never thought about how our apartment must look like to you. As if you were a guest here. You only have the souffle mold and some tarot cards that you are making. I know you didn’t have anything to actually move in with, but we could have -- we should have gone out and got you stuff. More clothes, books and movies you are interested in instead of just mine, some of the fairy lights up around the place instead of just lamps.” She paused and let out a large sigh, closing her eyes for a few beats (one, two, three, four (he’s Four)), “A bed. I shouldn’t have just listened to you. I should have gotten you a bed. How can I expect you to feel like you can rely on me, in our home, if it doesn’t feel like your home.”

Klaus was having trouble breathing. (Let it not be said he didn’t have issues and apparently this easy acceptance was one. Easy acceptance and love. It couldn’t (wouldn’t) last. Surely not. _Not for him_. It was better to expect to be thrown out and into the trash he loved to go through (he belonged there). If he didn’t expect to stay it didn’t hurt (as much) when he was told to leave. If he left before he was told to leave. If he never came by in the first place, no one would turn him away. 

_Why would Vanya want him to live with her?_)

“You know that right?” Vanya asked, “That this is your home too?”

(He hadn’t.)

He should say yes. He should lie. It would make her feel better. 

He waited too long to reply (lie).

She was crying.

“No, no, don’t cry, Van,” reaching out, he wiped some of her tears away. He had to do something (anything) to make her feel better. He was floundering (he floundered a lot in life) with what he could do to help. She wouldn’t believe any of his lies right now (she was getting _really good_ at seeing through his lies) and he couldn’t backtrack his surprise at her words, nor could he appear to suddenly believe her. 

He’d fucked up.

Time to fix it. (How?)

He looked around the room for inspiration. It was a pretty small room -- bigger than their bedrooms in the Academy (a full city block and Four and Seven stuck in the rooms smaller than the pantry (the pantry was always full, seven growing kids and one of them was Luther)). She didn’t even have room for a desk. A dresser, a closet, a houseplant, a bed. 

“You, uh -- I mean,” Klaus cleared his throat, “we only have vertical space here. In our --- In our bedroom?” (This was stupid. No room for another bed. No room for him.) 

“Bunk beds,” Ben immediately spelled out for him. 

“Bunk beds,” Klaus repeated. “That could work? Vertical space and all. _Stack those beds_.” He looked and Vanya was looking hopeful, a small smile on her face (why?). “You could take either the top or the bottom, Van. I’m versatile.” He winked flirtatiously at her, trying to lighten the mood. (_He made her cry._)

She laughed at his weak joke.

He wished he could hear her laugh. (Maybe he could get Ben to describe it to him later.)

It probably sounded great. He didn’t remember her laughing a lot as a kid, if he was honest. A sense of pride overcame him, he made her laugh (but only after he’d made her cry. Such a villain making such a sweet girl cry.). 

She had seemed happier than in childhood. Possibly because she was out of the Academy (the large mansion is surprisingly crushing). (Possibly because he was in her life now? Could he be making her happier? She’d hinted, since he moved in, how she’s no longer lonely and how she enjoyed his company and his sense of humor and she’d missed him (no one misses him) so maybe she didn’t plan to send him away and maybe they’d get bunk beds and maybe he can make her laugh some more (he loved her smile). It was possible. Right?)

She nodded, “We’ll look at bunk beds tomorrow.”

She gathered him up in a blanket, wrapping it around his shoulders and pulled him close, so she could hear his heartbeat. He’d noticed that every so often, usually after a rough conversation (rough for either (or both) parties but usually when it was about him) she’d want to listen to his heartbeat. He didn’t blame her, back _before_ he’d do that with his flings and one night stands. He did it because he needed to know they were alive, that not everyone was a ghost. She seemed to do it to remind herself he was there (and alive). 

He wished he could hear heartbeats.

He thought she was asleep when he whispered as much to her.

She hadn’t been.

Frowning, she grabbed his hand and wrapped it around her wrist. _Feel her heartbeat_.

Klaus fell back asleep with Vanya breathing softly under his chin and her pulse beating against his fingers.

He’d never been furniture shopping. (Was it different than clothes shopping? Grocery shopping? Shopping for a new and reliable dealer?) He’d been in furniture stores before, a quick nap during a hot summer afternoon (some places let him sleep, some woke him up and sent him away). But the prices alone where scary enough (hundreds of dollars -- think of the drugs he could get) and then your credit mattered (_no credit, bad credit, ghost credit, it doesn't matter! we’ll loan you!_) and all this about zero down payment and no interest for the first twelve months (what did all of that mean?). 

It was overwhelming.

“I’m not worth the trouble of all this,” Klaus gestured as they stood outside the store. They’d googled stores close to them that had free delivery as well as good deals. 

“We went over this last night,” Vanya said. “You are worth the trouble. And it’s not actually that troublesome. We’ll look at some bunk beds, we have the measurements of our bedroom and I won’t even frown at you when you end up jumping on the beds. I may even smile.”

He loved her smile.

“You promise I can jump on the beds?” Klaus’s interest piqued. 

“They probably won’t like it but sure. You’ll be able to jump on at least one before you get told to stop.”

“Deal.”

They shook hands.

The deal was set.

(Blood signatures signed on the dotted line.)

They went to the bed section, then the bunk beds. Klaus took his time lounging and jumping and climbing ladders. (Klaus would take the bottom if Vanya wanted but a lot of the bunk beds had the bottom bed as a full bed while the top was a single. He figured that she currently had a full bed and didn’t deserve to downsize while he was now used to the sofa so a single bed was an upgrade.) (Could they buy only his single mattress and just use Vanya’s current? Did she need a new mattress? How often did you need to replace them?) 

They ended up on a bedset, both laying on the bottom bunk. He had his hand wrapped around her wrist again, heartbeat pulsing through his fingers. (She’d agreed to the bottom bunk, saying that she was worried about not only his height as he would sit in it but his claustrophobia. She may be right about on both accounts. Not that they were sure if Klaus would be able to fully sit up while on the top bunk but--) He quietly (?) talked about repainting the bedframe and if they weren’t renting he’d love to paint a mural in their bedroom (their bedroom!) and what if he just did it anyway and before they left just repaint it and no one would know and they’d have a kickass wall. _Could you imagine?_

She smiled and nodded along, giving short responses because she was spelling out words with her free hand. She didn’t even try to take her other hand away from him. (He loved her smile.) 

Eventually they got up and bought the bedset. (Klaus tried not to panic at the cost. This was Vanya’s money, he shouldn’t be making her spend it. (But he wasn’t was he? She wanted to spend her money on him, on this bunk bed.))

It was later, after they set it up, after they bought bedding for him, after they got fairy lights in the room, after they put up glow in the dark stars on the ceiling, after he took over her closet and Vanya got the dresser, after--

It was night. The stars and fairy lights twinkling around him that Klaus was overcome with a new feeling. A strange feeling. He leaned over his bed (his bed!), almost upside down to look at his sister. “Hey, Vanya,” Klaus hoped he was whispering as planned, not wanting to wake her but maybe she wasn’t asleep yet either.

An eye peaked open, “What?” She seemed tired. She was probably tired. She’d maybe get a bit annoyed if he kept up much longer (she had work in the morning).

“_Well_ I was just up here, trying to sleep when I realized that this is the first time -- I think the first time? Maybe when we were _really_ little and I didn’t know any better but I can’t remember ever during our stay at the Academy; anyway, this is the first time that I feel _safe_. So, y’know. Thanks. Oh no, Van, don’t cry!”

God, why did she put up with him (why?) when he kept making her cry. But this time she was smiling at the same time (oh a good cry, okay) (he loved her smile). She reached up and patted his cheek, a quick rhythm tapped out. “You are safe here. I love you, Klaus.”

Oh.

Maybe that was why.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> you can find me on tumblr under the same username (and icon)


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